


Through the Eyes of Others

by WinglessCrows



Series: Through the Eyes of a Cook [44]
Category: One Piece
Genre: Character Study, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-18
Updated: 2018-07-18
Packaged: 2019-05-27 08:10:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15020345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinglessCrows/pseuds/WinglessCrows
Summary: You wear your good traits on your back.Sanji doesn't see his own worth, but his friends certainly do





	Through the Eyes of Others

However unaware Sanji was of it, the love cook of the strawhat pirates shared many traits with his fellow crew mates. It was something he either chose to ignore or something he couldn't get himself to admit, because when Sanji looked at his crew he saw things he could never see in himself. The remaining members of the lovely pirate crew knew though. Sanji was just  _that_  amazing.

Just like the captain they sailed under, Sanji was kind by nature. This was a trait that was so painfully obvious to those around him, yet completely invisible to himself. He rarely put himself over others and when it seemed like he did, it was always to conceal that he was actually doing it for others anyway. And it wasn't just that he was kind because he had to be, he just enjoyed it. Sanji was kind because the happiness of others was contagious and  _how_  he loved to be the cause of that happiness. And unlike with Luffy where you had to earn his kindness, with Sanji you had to earn his anger. Yes, Sanji was kind by nature, yet he'd often look at his own reflection and see nothing but brutality reflected in his blue eyes and golden locks.

Like the swordsman Sanji so often fought with, he was strong. His bounty wasn't just for show and his strength was no ordinary thing. Behind it lay hard work, determination and, more importantly, creativity. Sanji wasn't only strong because he had a wonderful physique, but because he knew exactly where his strengths resided and he had taken his abilities to levels people could only dream of. He possessed abilities that could easily be mistaken for powers that came from devil fruits, yet one of Sanji's greatest assets was his underwater skills. No one on the crew moved as swiftly under water as the chef, and it was no coincidence that he was often the one who dived into the dangerous sea to save whatever ability user was drowning. Sanji was strong, indeed, but when he looked at his hands he would silently apologize for being too weak.

Sanji's traits didn't even limit themselves to his personality, because like the beautiful navigator, Sanji was handsome as hell. He had a tall lean build, which perfectly matched his dignified way of walking and his flexibly fighting style. He had clear blue eyes and golden hair just long enough to be tied in a ponytail and, if one was lucky, on a humid day, his blonde hair would start forming small curls at the ends. But Sanji always looked his best when he was smiling, it was just a shame he had never seen it himself, because the mirror only seemed to reflect a cruel and mocking smirk.

Sanji was brave, though he always mistook that bravery for recklessness, and he often found himself looking at Usopp and wishing that he could be more like him. Because while Sanji was brave enough to stand his ground against enemies twice his size and much stronger than him, he didn't have the courage to turn his back on the things that hurt him. He just did his best to endure it. It never once occurred to Sanji that he had a voice and opinion, when he was hurting.

However, he always remembered to use his voice when his morals were being tested. Just like Chopper couldn't ignore an injured stranger, Sanji couldn't ignore the starving. Of all the shit Sanji had been through, almost starving to death soon after he had gained a freedom he never even knew existed was the worst thing he had ever experienced. He couldn't even find it in himself to wish that fate on his worst enemy.

Sanji was smart. Always two, three, five steps ahead of everyone. He made sure to do things that would mess things up for their enemies later down the line and when it would be way too late for anyone to fix it. On top of that he was also a fast learner and sometimes Robin wondered how fast he'd learn the ancient language if she sat him down to teach him. She often concluded that he'd learn faster than she had. He had a logical mindset, and a near perfect memory. One only had to look at the amount of recipes he knew to be impressed, because even though he owned many recipe books he very rarely used them for anything other than inspiration. One would also find that the recipe books Sanji hadn't made himself would often contain corrections or comments, because apparently Sanji could take a perfect dish and make it even better. And, unknown to anyone but Sanji, he could fluently speak about seven languages, some of which had gained him information about things he probably shouldn't know of. Yet, for some reason, Sanji was unaware that this was actually something out of the ordinary and he never really shared these talents with anyone.

And Sanji's wit extended even further than knowledge. Just as Franky could instantly determine the potential of whatever scrap was lying about and create something amazing from it, Sanji could look at something complex and determine how it worked and how best to stop it from working. It wasn't a skill which Sanji often used, but  _oh_  how it had saved their lives on so many occasions. But all Sanji saw was the way Franky could create and the way he himself could only destroy. It truly was terrifying being inside Sanji's head.

One thing Sanji did love himself for was his cooking abilities. They were his pride and his heart, and he could easily lose himself in it entirely and thus forget all the things he hated himself for. When cooking was involved in any form (it could just be a conversation), Sanji's smile came easily and since he spent most of his waking hours in the kitchen, it had become a rarity to see Sanji in foul mood for no apparent reason. So while Sanji didn't really have many qualities he liked about himself (or just didn't accept existed), the one thing he did like seemed to outshine everything else.

And in all his life, Sanji had never once been in a situation where the side he hated and the side he loved collided. Cooking was such a separate reality that nothing from his past could penetrate the little bubble he created in the kitchen. And so, Sanji never expected that his past could suddenly arise within the bubble.

"You're quite humble, aren't you Sanji-san?" Brook said one morning when him and Sanji were in the kitchen enjoying a cup of tea. There wasn't really much for Sanji to do, since everything was either simmering slowly in a pot or baking in the oven. Therefore Sanji was standing behind the counter, opposite of where Brook was sitting, and just enjoying some morning tea.

"What do you mean by that?" Sanji replied and took a sip of the drink, feeling the soothing liquid warm him up from the inside. There was no better remedy for the cold than freshly brewed tea.

"I just find it strange that someone with royal blood would choose a career in cooking."

Sanji nearly choked on his tea: "How did you...?" Sanji said when he was done coughing.

"I told you, I used to lead a battle convey for a kingdom, and I encountered many people during that part of my life. Most memorable were the Vinsmokes. Strong warriors they were," Brook started and Sanji suspected that he would have closed his eyes had he had the ability to. He was definitely reliving some past memory at the moment, "Dignified, powerful and beautiful. Fair skin, golden hair, crystal blue eyes and, of course, their curly eyebrows. Such a recognizable trade mark. I'll never forget the way they seemed to defeat us without even breaking a sweat. It's a miracle I'm still alive... Even though I'm dead, yohoho~"

Brook must have stopped daydreaming, because he suddenly sounded alarmed as he said Sanji's name.

Sanji had broken and collapsed to his knees. He wasn't even completely sure why he so suddenly felt like a frightened little kid. There was nothing to be scared of. They were just having a conversation. Brook was just telling a story. Yet, because Sanji had always found the kitchen a safe haven, the sudden reminder that his past was not a forgotten memory and that his family who had done nothing but horrible things to him were still out there... that was too much.

"Sanji-san!" Brook was now beside him, "Do you want me to get-"

"No!" Sanji said firmly. He didn't want anyone to see. He didn't want anyone to know. These were his own demons. This was his fight.

Sanji closed his eyes and tried to think of something else. Tried to leave everything behind. He could no longer hear Brook. Whether it was because he had stopped talking or Sanji had completely blocked him out, he couldn't tell. He could feel himself shaking though. His hands, which had been so steady only moments earlier, were shaking so much Sanji gripped his elbows tight, trying to get them under control. But he couldn't. Not really.

Sanji wanted to be strong and brave. He truly did, but he wasn't strong enough to face his past and he wasn't brave enough to walk away from it. So he embraced it. He let it hit him, and accepted that this was the punishment for his cursed blood. This was his punishment for never being good enough.

Eventually Sanji calmed down and came back to reality. Brook was still beside him, and by some miracle, no one had entered in the time that for Sanji had seemed like an eternity.

"I'm sorry," Brook said softly, "I won't mention it again."

But of course Sanji wasn't going to let him take any of the blame: "You didn't know," Sanji said just as softly, "Besides... This is my punishment. I deserve it."

This took Brook aback, "What do you mean  _punishment_?" The skeleton tilted his head slightly, "You are such a kind hearted person. You don't deserve to suffer like this."

"Kind...?" Sanji chuckled. It was funny how other people perceived him, "My blood is cursed..."

"We wear our good qualities on our back," Brook said suddenly and put his hands on Sanji's shoulders, as he started lecturing him about life and whatnot, "You are definitely a kind person, Sanji-san, even if you can't see it yourself. Blood? Looks? Abilities? None of that defines us. Only our actions."

Sounds from the deck interrupted their little heart to heart, and Sanji slowly found the strength to stand again. Brook hurriedly started to set the table before Sanji could get the chance to, and let him stay in the kitchen to start the finishing touches on the breakfast.

 _Our actions define us?_ Sanji thought as the strawhats slowly walked through the kitchen door and sat down around the table.  _I ran away because I wasn't strong enough to stand up to my family. I can't fight women because I'm not brave enough to let go of my past. I was recognised because I wasn't smart enough to disguise myself._ Sanji slowly put the dishes on the table and watched as his crew dug in. He wished he could be more like them.


End file.
